Conservation in BramptonIn the interests of resource conservation and environmental protection, and in conjunction with Brampton Council's waste paper, tin can and bottle recycling schemes currently operating, local experts Pots Industries are placing used condom collection bins in local supermarket car parks. A spokesperson for the company said: "We have tried operating a monthly door to door collection service, but with limited success. The local youngsters that we employed part-time to do our collecting were being treated very badly by many local residents, though not all, and frankly we are disappointed that the public could not show a little more support for a scheme which not only provided employment for 10 to 13 year olds in Brampton, but also introduced an awareness of environmental responsibility to their young minds and to the general public." The new collection bins will be bright pink, six feet high, and scented with coconut and mango. ***** |
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Tired of faeces on your footwear? You need the new ~ Excrement Removal Implement ~ from Pots Industries Ltd. |
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All too often when out walking or sunbathing one has the misfortune to find oneself smeared with unwanted sewage, no grass or other foliage nearby and no other hygienic way of removing the ghastly mess. The new tool has a scientifically developed * to remove the more stubborn stools from shoe treads or between toes etc., *, a comfortable state-of-the-art * and a space-age technology *, so that the device can be kept in a handbag or pocket with sanitary confidence. ***** (*UNSUITABLE FOR CHILDREN UNDER THE AGE OF 18 MONTHS WITHOUT ADULT SUPERVISION) |
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